Is It Shameful to Receive Help?

Is it shameful to receive help? Sadly, many people think so. Yet, such a crippling belief can hold a person in abuse and keep them from finding their well-deserved freedom and healing. Sometimes, to become free, you must press against popular belief and step into the unknown.

People have often asked me, “How do you remain so happy with all you have suffered?” I am elated to report that my smile is now genuine; however, that was not always the case. The image I presented to the world throughout my childhood and many decades into adulthood was a lie. In my younger years, one of the ways people identified me was as the child who always smiled. Flipping through old photo albums confirmed this trait. It also proves that the age-old adage, “Pictures never lie,” is false. I wore this perpetual smile as a mask to disguise the truth of my existence, even from me.

To see more Crystalisms, go to https://www.facebook.com/groups/1360983917796761.

For much of my life, I presented this persona of false joy to the outside world, even though it never accurately reflected my inner self. Throughout my school days, I put on a big smile as much as possible. Whenever someone placed a camera before me, I would grin from ear to ear.

To have genuine joy seep into my soul took time, effort, and the assistance of many qualified people, therapy, and medications. Ironically, even though I now live an authentic life, filled with joy, I struggle with presenting a sincere smile for the camera. Will life ever stop presenting conundrums?

Is It Shameful to Receive Help?

Is it shameful to receive help? Again, I answer this question with a definite “NO!” Someone once told me that no one should ever need therapy. All anyone would ever need to help them get through any of life’s struggles is a close relationship with the Lord, who will heal all emotional wounds. I consider that concept exceedingly dangerous advice to pass on, and I will explain why.

As a stout Christian, I believe that my Savior ultimately heals all our wounds. But our Lord doesn’t just grant us this blessing because of the strength of our faith. Our Heavenly Parent expects us to do our part, and that expectation often includes our dedicated actions as we strive for what we want in life.

Example:

In John 5:8, Jesus healed a lame man, unable to walk for thirty-eight years. However, Jesus didn’t just hand out a healing to this man. Our Lord expected him first to act. Jesus told this man, who had not walked for nearly four decades, to “Stand up, roll up your sleeping mat and go on home!” (LB).

This man could have held fast to his conviction of being unable to walk. After all, he had clung to this reality much of his life. But instead of grasping onto the only existence he had known, he did his part and fought past it. As a result, he found healing. Many more examples of this concept run through our scriptures.

In the same way, Jesus asks each of us not to settle into our ailments, whether emotional, physical, psychological, or the result of abuse. Our Lord asks us to believe that if we commit to doing our part, our Savior will care for the rest. Healing takes far more than faith alone. It also requires considerable work, dedication, and support from knowledgeable people. This site, found at https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/abuse/get-help, can help you learn more about how therapy can support your healing journey.

Because I do the Work, I now laugh

Since I have begun to walk my healing path, I’ve received this frequent question.” How do you remain so happy with all you have suffered?” One way I hold onto joy is by focusing far more on the blessings in my life than the hardships. For instance, I’ve never had to undergo the nightmare of cancer. No one in my immediate family has suffered from any form of dementia or natural disaster. Such blessings are far-reaching, and if you work at it, your list of “Nevers” will far outweigh your list of personal trials. But, for me to focus on a positive list such as this takes work. It is a way that I “Pick up my mat and walk.”

Hold onto Hope

No one knows what they will face in the future; however, God has gotten me through everything I’ve faced so far, and I have complete faith my Savior will continue to carry me through whatever my future brings.

Don’t ever regret making mistakes as you grow and heal. Making mistakes is part of the growth process. If what you tried is not working, or the therapist you are seeing is not the right fit for you, chalk it up as part of the process and seek out another. It takes courage to reach out to others for help and begin down the path of healing. Compliment yourself for your bravery to step onto the path of healing and never allow any perceived failure to stop you from moving forward. There are no failures in life, only lessons to learn from and opportunities for growth and healing.

Rich and I have often discovered that many things we first perceived as failures, in time, we could see them as blessings. I like calling them serendipitous experiences, events of unexpected good fortune. As an example, if I had not lived through the forty-six years of abuse I suffered, I would not have the first-hand resources to reach out to others trapped in abuse and provide help. I challenge you to open your eyes with a new sight and search for the blessings that resulted from your hardships.

When sadness enters, ask yourself, “What power do I have, and what can I appreciate in this moment?” Hope begins with acceptance, and acceptance opens the door to action. With action guided by Holy Grace, serendipitous results occur, bringing positive and permanent change.

I invite you to join me next time as I write about who the enemy is and provide a list of helpful resources.

Note to My Readers

Hopefully, you have gained value from this blog post. If you have, I would like to offer you the opportunity to purchase my books. You can purchase The Hidden Diamond and Robin’s Gift here at BUY THE BOOK – Crystal MM Huntley.

An additional site where you can find my books is https://bkbookshoppe.com. However, if you prefer to purchase from Amazon, you will find The Hidden Diamond at http://www.amazon.com/The-Hidden-Diamond-Crystal-MM-Huntley/dp/1665573767 and Robin’s Gift at https://www.amazon.com/Robins-Gift-Crystal-MM-Huntley/dp/B0CVL7746N.

Each purchase of my books supports my mission to break the chains of abuse. Once you have read either of my books, feel free to leave a review on the site from which you purchased it. Your review will encourage others to also seek out the path of healing.

***The Hidden Diamond*** – Immerse yourself in a journey that uncovers the worth of a wounded soul amongst a lifetime of sin.

***Robin’s Gift*** – Lost and alone, Natalie’s biggest dream is to fulfill her desire to be loved. A tragic accident calls her home. Can she return and face her greatest fear?

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Is It Shameful to Receive Help?

Example:

Because I do the Work, I now laugh

Hold onto Hope

Note to My Readers

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