Do you shield yourself with busyness? Many people naturally tend to remain wrapped up in busyness as a protective shield to separate themselves from undesirable aspects of their lives.
These past few weeks have been extra busy for me. Getting caught up with everything and settled back into my typical routine after taking an extensive trip, and then, throughout the week after we got home, I had multiple medical appointments to attend. Because of where we live, each medical appointment requires at least a full day of driving. Some even warrant an overnight hotel stay. The trip, these appointments, and the backlog of tasks, yet another aspect thrown into the equation I needed to accomplish, left me exhausted. All of this added together, required me to remain extra busy to catch up.
I’m one of those people who can always find something to do, never knowing boredom. I don’t do well remaining over-busy for an extended time. However, I know many who work in just the opposite way. They function best, keeping excessively busy as Melody from Robin’s Gift does. She, and many who operated this way, find that maintaining a constant busy mode gives them a much-desired shelter. It provides a mental escape from the aspects of their lives they do not want to go to. In Melody’s case, busyness keeps her from exploring grief from her mother’s death.
Robin’s Gift
(Excerpt from Chapter Forty)
Melody shook her head. Pale-blond hair bobbed about her facial features. “I can think of only one regret. It is a big one. I never saw it before now.” Melody’s nostrils flared as she drew in a breath. “My work keeps me so busy I never have enough time to slow down and enjoy my loved ones—No, that’s wrong! I don’t allow myself time to slow down and enjoy my loved ones.” A tear slid down her peach-blushed cheek. “Over the past few years, Robin often begged me to join her on a girls’ day out and go clothes shopping, just the two of us. But I never made the time. Now it’s too late. Natalie, in honor of Robin, we must do that soon.”
Natalie nodded and patted Melody on the hand who reciprocated with a tight squeeze of Natalie’s fingers.
“My children are growing up so fast their lives flash past me in a blur. I am not here nearly enough for them. I keep myself too busy to be available.”
The Busyness Shield
Grief is a painful place to enter. Human beings seek pleasure and instinctively avoid pain, so why would we purposely explore any aspect of pain? With this in mind, it makes perfect sense that so many of us go to extreme levels to avoid facing grief including nurturing a shield of busyness. Instead of facing grief in any form, we often stuff those undesired feelings deep within with the hope of never having to face them. But buried feelings never go away. Like a beach ball held underwater, the deeper we push it below the waves, the greater intensity the ball flies into the air when released. Anderson Cooper provides an excellent resource for assistance in facing your grief at www.cnn.com/audio/podcasts/all-there-is-with-anderson-cooper.
To heal from any form of grief, the death of a loved one, the loss of a specific physical ability, or even the grief that comes with healing from abuse, requires mental time dedicated to feeling the feelings and working those feelings through, see https://crystalmmhuntley.com/2024/04/is-solitude-good-for-you-discover-its-valuable-gift/. For further support in healing grief, go to https://www.verywellmind.com/five-stages-of-grief-4175361.
I know many people who use the tool of busyness to shield them from any aspects of life they do not want to accept. But if you never take the time to ponder, you will also never fully feel joy. The downfall in living a life of busyness is that it also shields you from experiencing the good moments of life. Like two sides of a coin, one cannot fully experience joy without knowing sorrow. See https://crystalmmhuntley.com/2024/10/your-brokenness-can-make-you-stronger/.
Time for Peace
You must frequently dedicate time to nurture a heart of peace. See https://crystalmmhuntley.com/2023/05/how-to-let-the-soft-whisper-guide-your-way/. You cannot hear that Still Small Voice if you remain too busy. I believe this fact is one reason I can’t handle too many hectic days in a row. The constant activities drown out that voice that connects me to my Maker, making me feel like I’ve lost my roots. See https://crystalmmhuntley.com/2023/05/how-to-rebuild-your-foundation-and-remain-rooted/.
One of the reasons I find it necessary to refrain from becoming too busy is due to my health issues. Sometimes, what seems like a hardship or even a curse may actually be a blessing. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I have lived since birth with Ehler ’s-Danlos Syndrome. This connective tissue disease has monopolized every aspect of my life, raving havoc with every system of my body and limiting my abilities and activities.
I’ve spent much of my life grieving over the loss of abilities this syndrome has caused. Yet blessings often exist in the most unexpected places. To manage this syndrome, I must make physical exercise a priority. Keeping my muscles strong is the only way to maintain my walking ability. See https://crystalmmhuntley.com/revealing-my-healing-the-miraculous-truth/. Staying healthy requires time and work, not an easy task in today’s go-go world. This dedication cannot happen if I keep myself too busy.
Blessing or Curse?
This syndrome causes me to tire extra quickly, requiring me to rest often. This requirement for more rest is a contributing factor that makes it impossible for me to maintain a life of extreme busyness. As a result, I have learned the value of taking time to enjoy the simple blessings in life that many overlook.
Since I have the natural tendency to always be on the go and push myself to the extreme, If I were not born with this syndrome that pulls me back and slows me down, I may have lived my life missing the calming beauty in nature God placed around us all. So, who knows, maybe, for me, Ehlers-Danlos syndrome is more of a gift than a handicap.
God placed the natural element of rest in nature. Step outside and breathe in a fresh breath of air. Allow God’s gifts of nature to nurture you.
To see more Crystalisms, go to https://www.facebook.com/groups/1360983917796761.
Note To My Readers
I invite you to join me next week as I will share how weaknesses can give a person strength.
Hopefully, you have gained value from this blog post. If you have, I would like to offer you the opportunity to purchase my books. You can purchase The Hidden Diamond and Robin’s Gift here at BUY THE BOOK – Crystal MM Huntley. However, if you prefer to purchase my books directly from Amazon, you will find The Hidden Diamond at http://www.amazon.com/The-Hidden-Diamond-Crystal-MM-Huntley/dp/1665573767 and Robin’s Gift at https://www.amazon.com/Robins-Gift-Crystal-MM-Huntley/dp/B0CVL7746N. Two additional sites where you can buy my books are https://bkbookshoppe.com and https://bizybookstore.com.
Each purchase of my books supports my mission to break the chains of abuse. Once you have read either of my books, feel free to leave a review on the site you purchased from. Your review will encourage others also to seek out the path of healing.
Alexandra All souls are priceless no matter their past. A personal reason to testify. Assure myself with a pep talk. Boundaries Breaking Out Breathe into the space of peace. Complex CPTSD Continue to write for God. Difficult people can become a catalyst for growth. Discover My Newest Post Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome Forgiveness Free Giveaway From Robin’s Gift God chooses. Grace Enters Hope How I got out of the wheelchair. Installing Healthy Boundaries Invite Keep up the good work. Master New Skills My Mission My Story No meaningful journey exists without pitfalls. Note To My Readers Resources Robin’s Gift Robin’s Gift – A Sneak Peak Share my healing journey. Taboo topics have infiltrated people. Take the Challenge Thank you. The Behind Story The Hidden Diamond Transcend into healthy boundaries. Upcoming Posts We Don’t Know What We Don’t Know. Why I Write Writing Is My Passion Writing Mirrors Life You Are Worthy! Your Gain “When I am weak then I am strong.”
