How to Avoid this Dangerous Myth. Stop Being a Victim! Have you fallen into the trap of the common lie that you must forgive and forget? Sad to say, many have.
Heal Your Soul Layer by Layer
“As you know, most of my writing centers on healing—especially from the effects of abuse—and forgiveness. These topics remain constant within my books, blog, and even the “Crystalisms” on my Facebook group. For a soul to heal, forgiveness is crucial. When a person forgives, they find a new-found freedom. However, effective forgiveness must always contain carefully placed boundaries.
Layer One
A perpetrator’s actions always produce devastating effects, robbing their victim of so much. Let’s peal back the layers of the “forgiveness fallacy.” One layer is the belief that forgiveness is for the offender. Yet, it is just the opposite. Forgiveness is for the victim. Regardless of how much another has taken from you, if you choose the path of forgiveness, they can never take your soul.
Layer Two
A second layer contains the common fallacy of “forgive and forget.” This phrase is too often carelessly thrown about. It places victims in harm’s way. This reckless mistruth gives people the impression that they should continue life as if nothing happened. Doing this will leave you stranded in dangerous waters. Genuine forgiveness does not forgive the act. Nor does it forget what that person is capable of. On the contrary, it arms you with God’s peace while disarming the sting of bitterness and healing your soul.
Layer Three
Another common deception is the notion that forgiveness means letting a perpetrator off the hook. Alternatively, it means finding peace within the situation. This newfound peace frees you to move on to a better and more fulfilling life.
Repentance
While forgiveness is for the victim, repentance is for the transgressor. Repentance means confessing sin, asking for forgiveness, and making necessary changes to assure they never again violate another. A solitary “sorry” does not qualify as repentance. Yet, it often is used by perpetrators to fake remorse. True repentance means to change the direction of their behavior. Another way of stating this is taking responsibility for a behavior and its consequences. Without such resolve, the person who abused another continues to be dangerous. Sadly, most in need of true repentance remain unable to do so.
The Hidden Diamond
In The Hidden Diamond, I use the enchantment of fiction to illustrate how true repentance can look. I do this through Aldous, my perpetrator. In my book, he turns to God with an open heart and seeks repentance while fully confessing his shameful sins. Aldous not only asked forgiveness of God, but he also became willing to make the necessary changes to become transformed. Psalm 57:2 reminds us that God hears our cries, understands our needs, and comes to our aid when we call upon our Savior.
To see more Crystalisms go to https://www.facebook.com/groups/1360983917796761.
Take the Challenge
Each of us needs forgiveness, whether victim, perpetrator or—as in the case of Aldous—both. I challenge you to inspect your heart and seek areas where you need repentance. Call upon your Savior to shower you with loving grace. God’s guidance is critical to make the necessary changes so you can sincerely repent.
Hopefully, you have gained value from this blog post. If you have, I would like to offer you the opportunity to purchase my book, The Hidden Diamond, BUY THE BOOK – Crystal MM Huntley, and support my mission to break the chains of abuse.
Abuse Through Image A Reinterpretation Back to My Story Boundaries Breaking Out Direct Forms of Religious Abuse Domestic Abuse Defined Excerpt from The Hidden Diamond Faith Shattered From Robin’s Gift Happenings or Interpretations? Hope Indirect Forms of Religious Abuse Invite Long-term Effects My Fight for You Note To My Readers Perfection’s Curse Religious Abuse vs. Spiritual Abuse Resources Robin’s Gift Robin’s Gift – A Sneak Peak Seeking Help Seek Understanding Shame Has No Place Step Five Step Four Step One Step Six Step Three Step Two Summer’s Story Take a Step Back. Take the Challenge The Commitment to Braking Chains of Abuse The Hidden Diamond The Scars of Abuse Two Other Forms of Legal Abuse Unhealed Wounds Unwittingly Harm Others. Unveiling the Hidden Crime Upcoming Posts We Don’t Know What We Don’t Know. What Is Legal Abuse? Why I Write You Are Worthy!
